末日巡逻队
第一季 第一集
巴拉圭 1948年
准备好看关于超级英雄的故事了吗 Ready for a story about superheroes?
又是超级英雄电视剧 Ugh. More TV superheroes.
正式世界所需要的 Just what the world needs.
老实说 你还没被烦死吗 Be honest, have you hung yourself yet?
或者如果我告诉你 Or what if I told you
这个故事是关于超级废物的呢 this was actually a story about super-zeroes?
失败者 极其可悲的超能力蠢蛋 Losers, achingly pathetic meta-human goose eggs.
怎么样 How about it?
准备好接下来一小时为你悲惨的人生 Ready to feel better about your own miserable lives
感到欣慰了吗 for the next hour or so?
跟我来 Follow me.
我们故事的开端 Our story begins,
作为惯例 要拜访纳粹 as such stories do, with a visit to a Nazi.
不好意思 是鞋匠 I'm sorry. Cobbler.
莫登先生 Mr. Morden.
是我 您一定是冯·福克斯少校 Yes. Yes, you must be Sturmbanhfuhrer Von Fuchs.
马丁内兹 Martinez.
-您说什么 -马丁内兹先生 - Sorry? - Senor Martinez.
谁 Who?
村里的鞋匠 The village cobbler.
冯·福克斯以他的理论试验闻名 Von Fuchs was renowned for his theoretical experimentation,
收费提供某些增强 offering certain enhancements for a price.
莫登先生非常乐意支付 A price Mr. Morden was more than willing to pay.
我忘了说 Oh, I forgot.
莫登先生 就是我 Mr. Morden, that's me.
曾经是我 Well, it was me.
一个三流的坏蛋 A third-rate bad guy,
无名的走狗 真正的 a nameless henchman, a real...
无名氏 nobody.
我向那个疯狂的天才支付了一笔巨款 I forked over a king's ransom to that demented genius.
如果我早知道他为我准备了什么 And if I knew what he had planned for me,
我会付双倍 I would have paid double.
你能听到我说话吗 莫登先生 Can you hear me, Mr. Morden?
能 Yes.
你准备好了吗 莫登先生 Are you ready, Mr. Morden?
准备好了 Ready.
请跟我重复 Repeat after me, please.
-思 -思 - The... - The...
-想 -想 - mind... - mind...
-无 -无 - is... - is...
-止 -止 - the... - the...
-境 -境 - limit. - limit.
再来 Again.
思想无止境 The mind is the limit.
再来 Again.
思想无止境 The mind is the limit!
劲爆 Funky...
佛罗里达州 1988年
现在到了1980年代 And now to the 1980s.
在这乌烟瘴气的俗世之中 Somewhere in this abomination of gauche and blow,
有一个苍白的屁股正上下耸动 is a pale white ass pumping up and down.
一个英雄的屁股 The ass of a hero.
不是那个屁股 No, not that ass.
不是 No.
吉塞尔 Giselle?
吉塞尔 Giselle!
吉塞尔
是这个 There it is.
英雄就是这个味儿 Mmm. Smells like hero to me.
谁是猛男 Who's the fox?
你是 You are!
吉塞尔 Giselle!
谁是猛男 Who's the fox?
天哪 Oh, my God.
吉塞尔 Giselle.
克拉拉在哭 Clara is crying.
真的吗 我看她挺好的 Really? Looks fine to me.
她很好 亲爱的 你不能这么怕她 She's fine, honey. You can't be so scared of her.
看啊 婚姻的坚实基础 Behold, the bottom rung of marriage.
相互蔑视 Contempt.
你好吗 邦普 How are you doing, Bump?
怎么了 What?
你怎么让凯特答应雇佣她的 How the hell did you get Kate to agree to her?
你这个老色鬼 You're a dirty old man.
知道吗 这叫信任 You know what? It's called trust.
我以为第三任老婆的时候你就明白了 Thought you would have known that by wife number three.
车祸撞死 宝贝 Crash and die, babe.
我也爱你 达令 I love you too, honey.
-往中间开 大家伙 -这里有点挤 - Get to center, big fella. - Little snug in here.
等进了骨灰盒再哀怨吧 Yeah, how about you cry about that back in the box.
看到了吗 You see that?
你好啊 Oh. Hey, there.
-什么 -没什么 克里夫 - What? - Uh, nothing, Cliff.
我们比赛呢 邦普 We racing here, Bump?
当然了 Hell, yeah.
什么鬼 What the fuck?
你上了我老婆 You're fucking my wife?
克里夫 我对天发誓 没有 Cliff, I swear to God, no!
对 他上了 Oh, yes, he is.
猜猜我在干邦普时从来不用说什么 And guess what I never have to say when I'm banging big ol' Bump?
-闭嘴 -"你进来了吗" - Don't! - "Is it in yet?"
不 No!
我不知道我们之间怎么了 I don't know what happened to us.
我会改过自新 I'm going to be better.
我不知道我们之间怎么了 I don't know what happened to us.
我会改过自新 I'm going to be better.
1983年 赛车运动
克里夫·斯蒂勒
乱炖锅好了 Trainwreck's ready!
你觉得她知道我们是谁吗 Do you think she even knows who we are?
克拉拉宝贝 你爸爸总有一天 Baby Clara, your daddy's gonna be
会成为一流的赛车手 a big-time race car driver one day.
不是的 No.
我是说她知道我有多爱你吗 I meant do you think she knows how much I love you?
克里夫 克里夫 快醒来 Cliff. Cliff, wake up.
难以置信 Fudge.
三电值驱动焊接守则 Three electrical values drive welding principles.
所需要的电流与安培数是... The amount of current or amperage in a current...
克里夫 克里夫·斯蒂勒 Cliff. Cliff Steele.
我是奈尔斯·考尔德教授 My name's Dr. Niles Caulder.
如果你能听懂我的话请点头 Would you please nod your head if you can understand me?
我都不知道你是否真的爱我 汤姆 I'm not sure you ever really loved me, Tom.
你知道我父亲是怎么评价 You know what my father used to say
你这种伶牙俐齿之人的吗 about smooth talkers like you?
"但是"之前的话都是胡扯 Everything before the "but" is baloney.
我想要你 I want you to...
回忆起自己 remember what it felt like
移动头的感觉 to move your head.
在脑中想象一下 Picture it in your mind.
现在 我想要你 Now, I want you
动动你的头 to move your head.
很好 Good.
非常好 Very good.
你遭遇了可怕的事故 克里夫 You've been in a terrible accident, Cliff.
你的身体大部分已经无法修复了 Much of your body was rendered beyond repair.
但我们就快成功了 But we are getting there.
我向你保证 很接近了 I promise you, we're close.
休息吧 Rest.
鸟 Bird.
飞 Fla.
飞翔 Flew.
操 Fuck.
-飞翔 -操 - Flew. - Fuck.
1995年 1995?
是的 Yes.
都他妈的1995年了 Fuck. Nineteen ninety-fucking-five?
上 Up-uh.
我老婆 哪里... My wife. Where...
我老婆在哪里 Where's my wife?
克里夫 这对你来说可能很难接受 Cliff, this might be difficult to process.
世人认为你在1988年就死了 The world thinks you died in 1988.
我没死 I'm not dead.
并且每天都在强壮起来 And getting stronger every day.
混蛋 你对我做了什么 You motherfucker! What did you do to me?
-我们休息一下如何 -不 等下... - How about we take a break? - No, wait...
首席是个好人 Chief's a good man.
高尚 略古怪 也许有些含糊不清 Big heart. Little odd, maybe a little vague.
但他的出发点是善良的 But it comes from a good place.
而我总会实话实说 Me, I'll always tell you the truth.
首席告诉你世人认为你死了 The Chief told you the world assumes you're dead.
他有没有告诉你 这是因为 Did he tell you that's because
他唯一能救下的 只有你的大脑 the only part of you he was able to save was your brain?
没有 No.
所以我们该来谈谈期望了 Which means we need to talk about expectations.
你真正想要的是什么 What you really, really want.
-我想要回家 -那么 - I wanna go home. - And then,
我们需要打包这些期望 we need to take those expectations,
轻轻地拍拍 we need to give them a gentle pat
然后从厕把它们冲进海洋 and flush them into the ocean.
什么 那是什么 What... What's that?
天哪 不要 Oh, my God. No!
我...不 等等 这是什么 I... No. No, wait, what's that?
我跟你说了他还没准备好 I told you he wasn't ready.
所有人都值得拥有真相 Everyone deserves the truth.
你跟以前的自己看起来不同 You don't look like the person you used to be.
这已成定局 There's no getting around that.
不过 But...
我们给你找了些衣服 We found you some clothes.
希望你能看到你还是自己 Hopefully, you'll see you're still very much you.
是啊 Sure.
这是什么地方 So, what is this place?
我的家 My home.
一个可以让你 A safe place for you,
以及其他像你一样的人 others like you,
安全疗愈的地方 to heal.
我老婆在哪里 Where's my wife?
你还记得些什么 克里夫 What do you remember, Cliff?
-去你的 克里夫 操 -我还能怎么 - Fuck you, Cliff! Fuck you! - What the fuck am I supposed to...
妈妈 Mommy!
告诉我她开始了新生活就好 Just tell me she's moved on.
已经七年了 It's been seven years.
她认为我死了 She thinks I'm dead.
她开始了新生活 She's moved on.
我就会如此 I would have.
我留不住记忆 I can't hold a memory.
一切都支离破碎 糟糕透顶 Everything's fractured. Everything's bad.
你现在的症状叫作解离性失忆 You're experiencing something called dissociative memory.
记忆会恢复的 It'll all come back.
坏的与好的都会 The bad and the good.
我们会帮你重新振作起来 We'll get you on your feet.
你很快就能找回自己 You'll start feeling like yourself soon enough.
克里夫·斯蒂勒 拉瑞·崔纳 Cliff Steele, Larry Trainor.
我想他能够协助你恢复 I thought he might help you with your recovery.
拉瑞带克里夫参观了一圈 And Larry gave Cliff the grand tour.
像推着一车啤酒桶一样 Wheeling him around like a couple of pony kegs
游览了这座 我们之后所熟知的 through this home, we'll come to know as...
末日庄园 Doom Manor.
我觉得你可能想呼吸点新鲜空气 I thought you might like some air.
我感觉不到空气 I can't feel the air.
那你可真惨 Sucks to be you.
和你的猫一起被埋在金字塔里是什么感觉 Hey, what was it like getting buried in a pyramid with your cat?
幽默感在这里很有帮助 Yeah, a sense of humor helps here.
你继续磨练吧 So you'll work on that.
那你的故事是什么 So what's your story?
我就是个开飞机的 I flew airplanes.
开飞机的 Flew airplanes?
拜托 拉瑞·崔纳简直就是美国之神 Please. Larry Trainor was an American god.
加利福尼亚州 1961年
空军试飞员 Air Force aviator test pilot
入选参与太空水星计划 shortlisted for the Mercury space program.
原子时代的荷尔蒙 An Atomic Age sex machine.
我的X15怎么样 How's my X-15?
我看看 推动力约26万千克 Let's see. We've got 57,000 pounds force of thrust.
速度六马赫 Mach 6,
就像骑在火箭飞船上一样 like riding a rocket ship between your thighs.
她是头野兽 She's a beast.
如果你今天有机会抬头看看天空 If you get a chance today, look up in the sky.
你会看到国家航空航天局的喷气式飞机 You'll see NASA's very own rocket plane,
X15冲上天际 the X-15 soaring into the heavens.
倒计时五秒 008 Five seconds, zero-zero-eight.
收到 Roger.
二 一 发射 Two, one. Launch.
我们这边显示顺利 拉瑞 We got a good light here, Larry.
检查你的攻角和航向 Check your alpha and your heading.
飞行员听天由命 A pilot doesn't reach Larry's status
是无法取得拉瑞的成就的 by leaving anything to chance.
他对所有情况都做足了准备 He was prepared for everything.
减压 Decompression.
非常敏感 Very sensitive.
恶劣环境 Harsh environment,
机械故障 mechanical malfunction.
崔纳唯一没有考虑到的... The one thing Trainor didn't count on...
圣母在上 Sweet mother of God.
是一个偷渡者 was a stowaway.
等一下 外面有东西 Hold on, there's something up here.
拉瑞 你的信号不清楚 You're breaking up, Larry.
再说一遍 请重复 Say again. Now repeat.
等一下 Hold on.
拉瑞 能听到吗 拉升飞机 Larry, do you read? Let's pull it up.
增加负荷 拉瑞 Put some G on it, Larry.
拉瑞 拉瑞 能听到吗 Larry! Larry, do you read?
拉瑞 请回话 Larry, come in.
他没有回应 He's not responding.
一个男人要有怎样的勇气 What man possessed of what grit
才能从这样的坠落中幸存啊 could survive such a fall?
还是说我们的金童 Or was our golden boy
刚刚拥有了新的能量 newly possessed of something else?
那天拉瑞从残骸中爬出来 Larry crawled from the wreckage that day,
永远地改变了 forever changed,
这种改变他花了几十年才开始理解 in ways that would take him decades to even begin to understand.
你做的事非常重要 克里夫 It is so important what you're doing, Cliff.
不过你知道 总还有明天呢 But you know, there's always tomorrow.
这个酒鬼是怎么回事 What's Drinky's deal?
谁 丽塔吗 Who? Rita?
她以前是演员 She was an actress.
她喜欢晚上这里的灯光 She prefers the light here in the evening.
你今天很美 丽塔 Looking terrific today, Rita.
操 Oh, fuck me.
有时想象一个你想要去的地方会有帮助 Sometimes it helps to picture a place you'd like to go.
我想要爬上这些该死的台阶 How about up the freakin' steps?
为什么要爬台阶呢 Why go up the steps at all?
我不能走路 I can't walk!
没有感觉 不能吃饭 I can't feel! I can't eat,
没有嗅觉 不能拉屎 I can't smell, can't shit.
不能做爱 I can't fuck
等我跟你和这里的其他怪物告别时 and I'd like to be able to do one fucking thing for myself
我想要能够为自己做 when I kiss you and the other fucking monster here
哪怕一件事 the sweet fuck goodbye.
爸爸 Hi, Daddy.
看到你女儿 这是好事 Seeing your daughter, that's good.
说明你的记忆开始恢复了 That means your memories are coming back.
也许她正是你所需要的激励 Maybe she's just the inspiration you need.
有人离开过这个地方吗 Has anyone ever left this place?
有些人离开过 Some have.
有些人来来去去 Some come and go.
而像拉瑞和丽塔这样的人更愿意留下来 Others like Larry and Rita prefer to stay.
丽塔做她的针线活 Rita has her knitting.
拉瑞打理他的园艺 Larry, his horticulture.
但是说实话 离开的那些人 But to be perfectly honest, those who leave
发现外面的世人往往比他们自己 find it's often more difficult for the world out there
更难接受他们的改变 to accept who they've become than they do.
好消息是 In better news,
我没有发现阻碍你 I can see no mechanical reason
走路的机械故障 why you shouldn't be able to walk.
继续努力 克里夫 Keep going, Cliff.
你就快成功了 You're nearly there.
你不是应该在练习迈不出步吗 Aren't you supposed to be not walking?
是啊 Yeah.
然后呢 And?
我在回忆 I'm remembering.
你以前是做这个的 You used to do this?
嗯 Yeah.
一圈又一圈 就这样吗 Around and around. That's it?
嗯 Yeah.
你以前演过电影吗 You were in the movies?
是影片 Pictures.
漂亮的丽塔 Lovely Rita.
50年代的院线女王 Queen of '50s cinema.
有些评论家称她为穷人的黛博拉·蔻尔 Some critics called her the poor man's Deborah Kerr,
拥有国际性声誉的英国电影 舞台和电视演员
有些评论家称她为富人的伊薇特·维克斯 some critics called her the rich man's Yvette Vickers.
美国B级电影演员
非洲 1955年
评论家 他们懂什么 Critics. What do they know?
他们肯定恨死这部剧了 They're gonna hate this show.
开拍 And action!
亲爱的母亲 今天在丛林中的狩猎很顺利 "Dearest Mother, today was a fine hunt in the bush.
汤姆猎到一头扭角羚 角挂起来会很壮观 Tom took down a kudu whose horns will look magnificent."
抱歉 Sorry.
角挂起来会... "Whose horns will look..."
丽塔 别这样 他是非洲最好的调焦员 Rita. Please. He's the best focus puller in Africa.
他有碍观瞻 查尔斯 他是个累赘 Ugh. He's an eyesore, Charles. A real liability.
如果我们把胳膊遮起来呢 What if we cover up the arm?
-换一身衣服呢 -把他赶走 - A different set of clothes. - Get rid of him.
但是全剧组都喜爱他 But the crew, they adore him.
那就把他的名字写到看板上 So put his name on the marquee.
丽塔 你要走上这个跳板 Now, Rita, you're gonna step onto this gangplank here.
鳄鱼会在那里出现 The crocodile will turn up there.
你会撕心裂肺地尖叫 You'll scream bloody murder.
然后乔会把它炸飞 And Joe'll blast 'er to Betsy.
你觉得你能做到吗 You think you can handle it?
当然 Of course.
没问题 It's fine.
完全没问题 It's totally fine.
好极了 Great.
开拍吧 开始 Turn over. Let's go.
《禁忌刚果》
好了吗 丽塔 Ready, Rita?
开拍 And action.
现在走上跳板 丽塔 Now up the gangplank, Rita.
就这样 There you go.
就像是美好的一天 而你 Like it's a lovely day. And you're--
你们怎么傻站着 快救她 Why are you just standing there? Help her!
快救她 Help her!
我没事 完全没事 I'm fine. I'm totally fine.
毛巾 Towel.
怎么了 What?
你们怎么了 没游过泳吗 What is wrong with you? You've never gone for a swim?
毛巾 Towel!
你在看什么呢 What are you staring at?
她逃走了 And away she ran.
畸形的丽塔 Monstrous Rita.
最终她来到唯一能让她 Eventually finding her way to the only place
感到安全 没有非议的地方 she would ever feel safe and unjudged.
坐在一个大脑旁 Sitting next to a brain...
啃食三只烤鸡中的第一只 Consuming the first of what would be three rotisserie chickens.
就爬一级 One step.
免得我一刀捅死自己 So I don't gut myself.
爸爸 Daddy.
以前我女儿学走路时 I used to hold my daughter's hands
我会握着她的手 when she was learning to walk.
而她总是想要爬楼梯 And she always wanted to go up the steps.
总是想要往上走 Always wanted to go up.
即使她自己能爬楼梯了 Even after she could do it,
我已经教会她了 after I'd given her the tools, you know,
她还是每次都站在那里 she'd just stand there every time,
想要我去帮她 wanting me to help her.
我就会特别生气 And I would get so pissed.
"自己爬台阶好吗" "Just walk up the goddamn steps, okay?"
那就来爬台阶吧 So, walk up the goddamn steps.
再爬一级 爸爸 One more, Daddy.
-到了 乖女儿 -你做到了 爸爸 - There you go, baby girl. - You did it, Daddy!
我的家人以为我在七年前的车祸中死了 My family thinks I died in a car crash seven years ago.
我女儿的成长过程中可能没有父亲 My daughter's probably grown up without a father.
我老婆可能已经开始新生活了 My wife's probably moved on.
但她们有权知道 But they deserve to know.
然后她们可以做出决定 And they can decide what to do with it.
谢谢你所做的一切 Thank you for everything you've done.
但是这个 But this...
这不是我 isn't me.
我激动得超乎想象 你能走路了 I'm thrilled beyond belief for you, that you're walking,
你找回自己的感觉了 that you finally feel like you.
我只是想给你提供一个包容的环境重振旗鼓 All I wanted was to give you a gentle place to land.
第二次机会 A second chance.
我很感激 And I appreciate that.
我想你准备好听这个了 I think you're ready to listen to this.
这是我用来重建你声音的电话留言 It's the phone message I used to recreate your voice.
我想这会帮助你 I think it'll help you...
理解你的大脑为了帮你适应 understand how your brain's been altering your memories
是如何篡改你的记忆的 to help you cope.
我不知道我们之间怎么了 I don't know what happened to us.
我会改过自新 I'm going to be better.
我不知道我们之间怎么了 I don't know what happened to us.
我会改过自新 I'm going to be better.
就是这样 小伙子 Yeah! That's how you get it done, son.
我不知道我们之间怎么了 I don't know what happened to us.
我会改过自新 I'm going to be better.
-我知道很晚了 -喂 - I know it's late. - Hello?
我不知道你是否在乎我的歉意 I don't know if you even care how sorry I am.
接着说 Go on.
谁想吃松饼 Who wants pancakes?
克里夫 Cliff!
不 No!
你没事 You're okay.
不 凯特 No. Kate!
天哪 不 Oh, God. No.
克拉拉 克拉拉怎么样了 Clara. What happened to Clara?
很遗憾你是唯一的幸存者 I'm afraid you were the only survivor.
不 不 不 No! No, no!
不 不 No, no!
不 不 不 No, no, no!
不 No!
我感觉不到疼痛 I can't feel pain.
不管我打得多重 No matter how hard I hit,
打哪里 打什么 where I hit, what I hit,
都感觉不到疼痛 I can't feel pain.
你太过分了 教授 That's mighty shitty of you, Doc.
岁月流逝 And the years passed.
实在太压抑了 我真受不了 And it's all so depressing. I just can't.
轨道赛车
警察局旁的那一幢新楼 That's a new building next to the police station.
是什么地方 What's it say?
图书馆 Library.
你的字真难看 Your handwriting is an abomination.
我是机械手指 Robot fingers.
爸爸 我回来了 Daddy, I'm home!
天哪 她来了 Oh, goodie. She's back.
-丽塔 -想来就来 想走就走 - Rita. - Comes and goes as she pleases,
跟这里是自己家一样 like she owns the place.
谁 Who?
不知道是谁 Who indeed.
这是简 有人叫她疯女简 Meet Jane. Some people call her Crazy Jane.
她有64个人格 每一个都有种不同的能力 Sixty-four personas, each with its own special power.
举例来说 这是西尔维娅 For example, here comes Silvia.
声音诡异 喜怒无常 Spooky voice, a bit moody.
我不困 I'm not sleepy.
我要和简说话 I want to speak to Jane.
现在是铁头 And watch now. Here comes Hammerhead.
这人很难搞 This one's kind of an asshole.
简不在这 你个小王八羔子 Except Jane's not here, you sissy little bitch.
她心情不太好 She's in a mood.
哪一个她都心情不好 Which one of her is in a mood?
什么鬼 What the fuck?
-这是 -铁头 这是克里夫 - Is that... - Hammerhead, this is Cliff.
他是玩具吗 Is he a toy?
放尊重点 Hammerhead!
-你是玩具吗 -是 - Are you a toy? - Yeah.
你问过了 你是发疯的傻子吗 Heard you the first time. Are you a raving douche?
见到你很高兴 铁头 Hello, Hammerhead. Good to see you.
滚一边死去 丽塔 Fuck off and die, Rita.
这是你的房间吗 大个子 This your pad, big guy?
你的灵魂洞穴 Your man cave?
里面有什么有魔法的东西 Where the magic happens?
来呀 让我看看里面有什么 Come on. Show me what you got.
里面有什么属于人类的东西 What kind of man stuff you got in here?
车子 Cars.
小玩具人开的小玩具车 Little toy cars for a little toy man.
里面肯定非常好玩 I bet it gets real wild in there.
夜深人静之夜 In the wee-wee hours of the night,
无人旁观之时 when you think no one's watching...
有人告诉过你要闭上臭嘴吗 Anyone ever tell you to shut your fucking hole?
不然呢 Or what?
你个小玩具能把我怎么着 Little toybot does what?
我是简 Jane.
我是克里夫 Cliff.
你就是机甲人 The Robotman.
铁头说你们两个见过了 Hammerhead told me you met.
她告诉你她抓了我的裤裆吗 She tell you she grabbed my junk?
铁头不八卦 Hammerhead doesn't kiss and tell.
你来首席这里多长时间了 How long you been busting the Chief's balls?
比你早多了 Long before you got here.
七天了 Seven days.
你知道大家见到首席时的情况 You know how it is when you meet the Chief.
人生巅峰 Best day of my life.
昨晚不都是铁头的错 It wasn't all Hammerhead's fault last night.
我的女儿下周过生日 Next week's my daughter's birthday.
我可能有 Pretty much the 30th year
三十年都没见过她了 straight that I haven't been with her.
可能我有点激动吧 I'm a little on edge, I guess.
就这样了 And so it was.
虽然两人稍有不快 After a brief misunderstanding
导致抓裆事件发生 in which junk was grabbed,
机甲人遇到了简 Robotman met Jane.
天下还算太平 And all was right and all was good.
暂时而已 For now.
天要黑了 It's getting dark.
简 Jane?
我不是 No.
我是刽子手的女儿 I'm the Hangman's Daughter.
好吧 Okay.
你还记得那种感觉吗 Do you remember what it felt like?
什么 What?
普通人的感觉 To be normal.
和普通人一样 Like them.
有时候我想回忆起来 Sometimes I try to remember.
有时候我希望自己还是 Sometimes I hope I still will be.
我不知道自己还有什么希望 I don't even know what to hope for.
我的画毁了 My painting's ruined.
一切都错了 Everything's gone wrong.
进去躲雨吧 Come in out of the rain.
-你为什么不回来 -为什么我要回去 - Why don't you get back here? - Why should I?
你只会喋喋不休地说战争 All you ever do is talk about the war.
愚蠢庄园的生活一成不变 And life in Dumb Manor proceeded accordingly.
首席觉得自己可以 So much so, the Chief felt comfortable enough
偶尔出差了 to resume his occasional travels.
你为什么要让我来这 Why did you bring me here?
我不会走太长时间 I won't be gone long.
大千世界 无奇不有 But there are mysterious things in this world
留意奇物 that bear keeping an eye on.
责无旁贷 So go, I must.
我们都互相理解 So, we understand each other.
带套 Bring a condom.
你注意点 And you, behave.
我几天后就回来 I'll be back in a few days.
再见 老爹 Bye, Dad.
尽管他们表面上无动于衷 Indifferent as they seemed,
但是他们都发现了 it did occur to each and every one,
亲爱的父亲 it had been a long time since all four
已经很长时间都没有回来了 were in the house without Dear Father.
他们想干什么就干什么 Why, they could do anything.
无所不能 Anything at all.
咆哮吧 Groan.
等等 Wait.
车到了 Honk, honk.
那是我的大巴吗 Is that my bus?
你究竟在做什么 What on earth are you doing?
我们在干什么 What are we doing?
我们要去镇里 We're going into town.
首席明确要求我们不能去 After the Chief explicitly asked us not to.
这是你策划过最鲁莽的计划 简 This is your most reckless scheme yet, Jane.
疯女简 Crazy Jane.
我加入 I'm in.
毫不意外 Shocking.
拉瑞 Larry?
你们有人在意 Um, does it matter to any of you
首席认为我们没准备好吗 that the Chief thinks we're not ready?
我不去 No.
-丽塔 -别犯傻了 - Rita? - Don't be ridiculous.
拜托 Oh, come on.
外面的大千世界正等着我们去探索 There's a whole world out there waiting to be seen.
但你却默默无闻六十年了 But hasn't seen you in 60 years.
我知道你在做什么 I see what you're doing.
激将法 Playing my ego.
我不会上套的 I won't be played.
好的 Okay.
针织愉快 Happy knitting.
-拉瑞 -别去 - Larry. - Don't.
拉瑞 Larry.
别说话 Don't say a word.
你很漂亮 You look nice.
那是当然 Of course I do.
别等我了 Don't wait up.
你们谁有钱吗 Which one of you has any money?
马上就来 亲爱的 Be with you in a second, hon.
-你没事吧 -没事 - You okay? - All good.
马上就到了 Almost there.
玩具与游戏
干什么 I don't get it.
你说过今天是你女儿生日 You said it was your daughter's birthday.
没有任何东西比得上麦芽酒 There is nothing, nothing like a malted.
我说的对吗 Am I right?
很不可思议 You know, this is crazy.
你说话方式都和她一样 你知道吗 You even talk like her, you know that?
谁 Who?
丽塔·法尔 Rita Farr.
五十年代的女演员 Actress from the '50s.
我爸逼我看了她参演的所有电影 My dad made me watch all her movies.
逼你 Made you?
她一定是当时唯一的先锋女性 让我觉得 She must have been the only actress that I was ever, like,
"你知道吗 我认可她" "You know what? I could hang with her."
她很酷 很性感 I mean, she was cool and sexy,
而且还很有气势 but a broad, too.
《圣达菲三枪手》那部电影 对吧 I mean, Three Guns To Santa Fe?
埃尔帕索 《埃尔帕索三枪手》 El Paso. Three Guns To El Paso.
好吧 所以你确实了解她 Okay, so you do know her.
我也不知道 I don't know.
很多时候 我爱她 Mostly, I loved her,
因为那意味着我能和我爸多相处一会儿 'cause it meant I get to spend extra time with my dad.
我们的生活很艰苦 It was a tough time in our lives,
但是丽塔·法尔让我们坚持下来了 but Rita Farr, she got us through.
请坐 Sit.
跟我说说 Tell me.
我父亲吗 About my dad?
不是 No.
每年有一天 我有个任务 One day a year, I had one job.
买礼物 Buy the present.
那是我最爱的一天 It was my favorite day.
她生日前几天却发生了那场意外 The accident was a few days before her birthday,
我当时沉浸在怒火中 and I was so angry by then,
气我自己 气我的妻子 at myself, my wife,
我度不过自己心里的坎 于是我就忘了 I couldn't see past my own bullshit, and then I forgot.
你忘了给你女儿买生日礼物 You forgot to buy your daughter a birthday present?
我那时很忙 I was busy.
忙着干保姆 Fucking the nanny.
你是傻瓜 You idiot.
没错 Yeah.
我现在压力很大 And now I'm totally stressed.
天哪 Oh! Oh, God.
我真很想抽你的大麻 I would so fuck that joint up.
但这是我的 滚开 Except it's mine, so fuck off.
有感觉吗 Anything?
打扰了 Pardon me.
你介意我点杯喝的吗 Would you mind if I ordered a drink?
想喝什么 What'll it be?
我要杯啤酒 I want a beer.
还有那部非洲题材的影片 And then there was that African picture.
《禁忌刚果》 Forbidden Congo.
《禁忌狗屎》吧 Forbidden dookie.
拜托 Oh, come on.
我听说她当时不舒服 I heard she fell ill.
他们中途替换了演员 They replaced her mid-picture.
-她是个酒鬼 -不是的 - She was a drunk. - No.
还有拍摄黄片的事情 And then, there was that whole porn thing.
什么 The what?
丽塔·法尔 Rita Farr?
相信我 我爸有满满一整袋 Oh, trust me. My dad had duffel bags full of the stuff.
你爸说丽塔·法尔拍摄黄片 Your father said Rita Farr was doing porn?
火力全开 Full on.
你觉得首席知道我们 How pissed do you think the Chief would be
出来被人瞪着会有多生气 knowing we were out here being gawked at?
我其实完全不在乎 I honestly don't give a fuck.
不 我不信 Nope. Not buying it.
什么 What?
我认为你很在乎他怎么想 I think you care a lot about what he thinks.
你都不了解我 You don't know me.
你就跟我们一样需要他 You need him like the rest of us do.
我不想承认 但我需要他 Hey, I hate to say it, but I need him,
来找回我的人生什么的 to get my life back, or whatever that looks like.
如果你想找回你的人生 If you want your life back,
为什么不直接给她打电话 why don't you just call her?
谁 Who?
你女儿 Your daughter.
我女儿死了 My daughter's dead.
-谁说的 -我女儿死了 - According to? - My daughter's dead.
因为你可以确定吗 Because you can confirm that?
还是很多消息源都这么说的 Multiple sources?
网上到处都是 伙计 It's all over the Internet, man!
你的垃圾开车技术 Your shitty driving.
妻子 凯特 身首异处 Wife, Kate, decapitated.
女儿 克拉拉 唯一的幸存者 Daughter, Clara, sole survivor.
闭嘴 简 Shut up, Jane.
全美有三个叫克拉拉·斯蒂勒的人 There are three Clara Steeles in the United States.
我女儿死了 My daughter's dead.
我们来查查看 Let's find out.
不要 No!
混蛋 Asshole!
拉瑞知道他们在盯着他看 Larry knew they were staring at him,
并且 没错 这让他很烦 and, yes, it bothered him,
但心烦的理由并非常人以为的那样 but not for reasons one might think.
事实是 拉瑞·崔纳早在变成怪物之前 The truth is, Larry Trainor had felt like a monster
就觉得自己是个异类了 long before he ever was one.
我们这边显示顺利 拉瑞 We got a good light here, Larry.
等一下 外面有东西 Hold on. There's something up here.
拉瑞 拉瑞 能听到吗 Larry, Larry, do you read?
拉瑞 请回话 Larry, come in.
他还活着 He's alive!
去找医疗兵 Get a medic!
拉瑞 Larry.
但更悲惨的事实是 And the sadder truth was,
他原本只觉得自己内心是怪物 he'd finally become what he had once
现在外表也是了 felt like only inside.
不 No.
你确定不要来些甜点吗 Sure you don't want any dessert?
结账吧 麻烦了 Just the check, please.
出什么问题了吗 小姐 Is there a problem, ma'am?
没有 警官 No, officer.
我看见的唯一问题就是你 猪猡 The only problem I see is you, pig.
又来了 Oh, here we go.
不 现在不行 No. Not now.
警官们 我朋友有点沮丧 Officers, my friend here is maybe a little depressed,
也或者是药磕多了 maybe a little high.
但她把刚刚说的话都收回 But she takes it all back.
快收回 铁头 Take it back, Hammerhead.
你们这俩混蛋中的哪一个 Which one of you motherfuckers
想让我在你们的屁股上拧几把 wants me to jerk a knot in your ass?
完球蛋了 Fuck me.
那是什么东西 What the hell is that?
丽塔 Rita.
天哪 丽塔 Oh, God. Rita.
不 No.
不不不不 No, no, no, no.
丽塔 Rita!
你能听到我说话吗 Can you hear me?
丽塔 Rita!
丽塔 死贱人 Rita! Fucking bitch.
控制住自己 Get a grip on yourself.
不不不不 No, no, no, no!
那是什么 What the hell.
我们该怎么办 What do we do?
不 我们不能那么做 No, we're not doin' that!
我们该怎么办 我们该怎么办 What do we do? What do we do?
我们该怎么办 What do we do?
退后 退后 Get back. Get back.
我想回家 I wanna go home.
我们这就走 We can do that.
今日新闻 In local news today,
第五届年度狗狗游行帮助... the fifth annual dog parade benefitting...
看看他们 Look at them.
盯着电视机 Staring into the boob tube,
因为白天的事情而闷闷不乐 moping on the day's destruction,
完全没有意识到 utterly clueless to the danger
他们小小的实地考察带来了何种危险 their little field trip had brought to their door.
很明显 当时有一团黏物横冲直撞 Apparently, it was some sort of giant blob run amok,
后来目击者描述的那个"机器男"出现 until what some witnesses described as a "robot man"
造出了这道用... created this barrier made of...
用主干道做的屏障 比尔 Well, made of Main Street, Bill.
爸爸回来了 Daddy's home.
我警告过你们别离开 I warned you not to leave.
我甚至求你们 I begged you.
你们根本不知道自己做了些什么 You have no idea what you've done.
事情没那么糟糕 It wasn't that bad.
根本不能用"糟糕"来形容 "Bad" doesn't begin to describe
今天发生在克洛弗顿的事情 比尔 what befell Cloverton today, Bill.
谢谢报道 温迪 Thank you, Wendy.
爸爸开始害怕的时候 It's always uncomfortable, isn't it,
一定很不舒服吧 不是吗 when Daddy gets scared?
不过他也应该害怕 As well, he should be.
奈尔斯·考尔德应该吓得尿裤子 Niles Caulder should be shitting his pants.
他知道即将来临的是什么 He knows what's coming.
要是不知道 他就是个傻子 He'd be a fool not to.
常言道常在河边走 You don't spend decades tap dancing on hornets' nests,
哪能不湿鞋 and not expect to be stung.
奈尔斯·考尔德有敌人 Niles Caulder had enemies.
他再也躲不掉的敌人 Enemies he could no longer hide from.
不管你们有没有意识到 Whether you realize it or not,
你们的行为... your actions...
你们的行为是会造成后果的 Your actions have consequences,
那些被招来的东西会来到庄园 and those consequences are coming to this house,
来到镇上 to the town.
毫无疑问 Of that, there's no doubt.
你真觉得我们危险吗 首席 You really think we're in danger, Chief?
我们需要收拾行李逃跑吗 That we need to pick up and run?
你真的那样认为吗 That's what you really, really think?
越远越好 As far away as possible,
越快越好 as soon as we can.
小镇会发生什么 What happens to the town?
小镇不是我主要关心的 The town is not my main concern.
那小镇要遭殃了吗 So, the town gets screwed?
你们已经害这座小镇够惨了 You've done quite enough to this town,
感谢你们 thank you.
一派胡言 This is bullshit.
你别惹我了 Don't you start with me.
你我都清楚 You and I both know
这次郊游不过是你为了自己开心 this field trip was for little more than your own amusement.
所以她现在成恶人了 So, now she's the bad guy?
好了 来说说你吧 首席 Okay, let's talk about you, Chief.
你告诉我我女儿死了 You told me my daughter was dead!
我想保护你 I was trying to protect you.
通过撒谎吗 By lying?
我现在就是在保护你 I'm trying to protect you now.
你真觉得她会接受你吗 Do you honestly think she would have accepted you?
我有过尝试的机会吗 Did I get a chance to try?
她失去了她的母亲 她的父亲 She lost her mother, her father.
我不知道她是否会接受我 I don't know if she would have accepted me.
你夺走了那个机会 You robbed me of that chance.
现在对她来说我算什么 What am I to her now?
什么都不是 I'm nothing.
我是个怪物 I'm a monster.
我向你保证 这个世界上有很多怪物 I assure you, there are many monsters in this world,
但你绝对不在 and none of them,
他们中间 not a one, is you.
我一直如此努力地保护你们 I've tried so hard to shield you.
我也知道我在要求你们做什么 And I know what I'm asking you.
离开你们所知的最安全的地方 To leave the safest place you've ever known,
走入会忽略你们 to step out into the world that would rather ignore you,
躲避你们 shun you,
轻视你们的世界 belittle you.
但如果你们留在这里 But if you stay here,
如果我们现在就死去 if we die now,
那这个神奇的试验 then this magical experiment,
这样的你们 this you,
我一生的成就 my life accomplishments,
全都 all,
会被... it will just...
会... It will...
或者我们不放弃小镇 Or we don't abandon the town.
保护他们抵御这些所谓的敌人 We protect them from these so-called enemies.
我们战斗 We fight.
我们可以 We could.
但那就是我们的末日了 But we'd be doomed.
现在不是吗 What are we now?
我要跟着首席 I'm going to go with the Chief.
同意 Agreed.
妈的 Fuck it.
被逼无奈 Shotgun.
坦白说 Hey, for the record,
小镇算个屁 the town can kiss my ass.
但那不意味着克里夫该一个人去 But that doesn't mean Cliff should go in there alone.
结束了 简 别去想了 It's over, Jane. Let it go.
好吧 只是我提议掉头 Okay, except I vote we turn around.
-不 -丽塔 - No. - Rita?
我不保证不会又变一滩 I can't promise I won't, you know, be disgusting.
但是 我同意 But, yes.
拉瑞 Larry?
拉瑞同意 Larry's a yes.
这是错的 This is wrong.
也许吧 Might be.
大概吧 Probably is.
我们会回来的 We'll be back.
瞧瞧他们 And there they go,
四个可爱的失败者 our four lovable losers,
想联合组成超级英雄战斗小队 banding together to become the superhero fighting force
去面对各位即将看到的家伙 no one saw coming except everybody.
不过别担心 But fear not.
有办法离开这个鬼地方 There's a way out of this dreck.
跟我来 Follow me.
没问题 It's fine.
完全没问题 It's totally fine.
巴拉圭 Paraguay.
是的 奈尔斯 Yes, Niles.
巴拉圭 Paraguay.
一如既往 巴拉圭 Always, Paraguay.
莫登 Morden.
没错 Sure.
但也不是 But not.
我早就不是莫登先生了 从那声... I mean, I haven't been Mr. Morden since...
"不 救救我"开始 No! Help me.
思想无止境
我欣赏你的朋友们 奈尔斯 I've been admiring your friends, Niles,
那些怪物们 很久了 those freaks of yours for quite some time.
你敢伤害他们 Don't you dare hurt them.
伤害他们 才不呢 Hurt them? No.
那多没意思 That wouldn't be any fun.
不行 No.
那就变成往事重现了 不是吗 That would be quite the same old story, wouldn't it?
我想这次我们要来点不一样的 I think we're gonna do something different this time.
不过有一点你说对了 You were right in one respect, however.
他们确实走向末日了 They are quite doomed.
这他妈是什么 What the fuck?