《绝望的主妇》前情提要 Previously on Desperate Housewives
勒奈特与汤姆的女友正面交锋 Lynette confronted Tom's new girlfriend.
你能不能别再 You think maybe you could stop
把我丈夫从我身边夺走呢 Trying to take my husband away from me?
你觉得我会因为你无法接受 You think I'm gonna give up on him
自己的婚姻告终 而放弃他 just because you can't accept your marriage is over?
麦克 Hey, Mike!
本发现了麦克的过去 Ben found out about Mike's past...
前科犯 Ex-con?
然后雇了他 And hired him.
我当然可以雇你 I can definitely use you.
布里给加布看了恐吓信 Bree showed Gaby the threatening note.
我很抱歉给你造成压力 I'm sorry to burden you with this--
你为什么非得告诉我 Why did you have to tell me?
然后她发现了本新开发案的选址 And then she discovered the location of ben's new development.
我们要把尸体挖出来 We're digging up the body?
本的推土机明早就要开始伐树了 Ben's bulldozers start tearing up the woods tomorrow morning.
卡洛斯和苏珊去哪儿了 Where are Carlos and Susan?
我不想把他吓坏了 I didn't wanna freak him out.
而苏珊近来一直紧张兮兮的 And Susan has done nothing but freak out,
所以就咱仨了 so it's just us.
-可当她们赶到现场时 -不 - But when they got there... - No!
她们发现有人已经领先一步 They found someone had beaten them to it.
纵使事态瞬息万变 No matter what the circumstances,
布里·范德坎普也总能让一切尽在掌握 Bree Van de Kamp always found a way to stay in control.
她含蓄收敛 She curbed her impulses.
她着装考究 She enforced a strict dress code.
她牢牢抓住道德的准绳 She maintained a strong moral center.
没错 布里总能有条不紊 Yes, Bree was always in control,
因此一旦面临危机 So when it came to handling a crisis...
这真是一场噩梦 我们该怎么办 This is a nightmare. What are we gonna do?
让她统领大局 再合适不过 It made perfect sense that she was in the driver's seat.
对 我真不敢相信 昨晚最悲剧的 Yeah. I mean, I can't believe the worst thing
竟然是没能搬运得了尸体 that happened tonight was not getting to move a dead body.
姑娘们 稍安勿躁 我得冷静思考 Ladies, please, I need to hear myself think.
天呐 如果他还活着怎么办 Oh, my god! What if he's alive?
没错 他只是在泥土里小睡了两个月 Right, and after a 2-month dirt nap,
然后爬出来了 He clawed his way out.
不 一定是有人把他给挖出来的 No, someone must have dug him out.
那是谁呢 要是警察怎么办 But who? What if it was the cops?
不行 我不能坐牢 No! I can't go to jail!
什么话 我们就能坐牢吗 What, and we can?
对 你还能拉帮结派 Yes! You'll start a gang.
布里还能去厨房帮忙 我是最弱小的 Bree will work in the kitchen. I'm the smallest one.
一定会被欺负的 I am so ending up somebody's bitch!
不是警察干的 Shh! It wasn't the police.
不然他们一定会封锁现场 They would have treated it like a crime scene,
弄得到处都是黄色警戒带 and that awful yellow tape would have been everywhere.
那好吧 你想想看 布里 Okay, then. Think about this, Bree.
要是有人知道我们干的这些事 What if it's someone who knows what we did,
并感到恶心 and it made them sick...
现在想去公诸于世呢 And now they're going to tell?
她为什么要这么说话 Why is she talking like that?
加布现在正妄加猜测 Gaby is engaging in wild speculation,
但根本没那回事 which isn't at all productive.
理由一定很简单 There has to be a simple explanation.
我们只需要深呼吸 好好思考 We just need to take a deep breath and think,
答案自会浮现出来 and the answer will be right in front us.
是苏珊 Susan.
天呐 一定是她 Oh, my god. Of course!
苏珊为什么要把尸体搬走 Why would Susan move the body?
因为她又疯又傻 Because she's cuckoo crazy.
我们埋尸后 她情绪一直很不稳定 She's been flipping out ever since we buried the guy.
好 那如果是她怎么办 我们怎么做 Okay, then what if it was her? What do we do?
我们这就去她家问个究竟 We march over and we ask if she did it,
如果是她干的 And if she did,
我知道有个墓穴还空着 留给她好了 I know an empty grave that's going to waste.
可如果不是她干的 But if she didn't,
那我们瞒着她去小树林的事 then we just admitted that we went
就不打自招了 to the woods without her.
想象一下那傻子会有什么反应 Imagine what cuckoo will do with that.
那我们只好拐弯抹角了 Clearly, we have to be diplomatic, crafty.
先探探口风 在她家寻找蛛丝马迹 We'll ask indirect questions, scan her house for clues.
在不引起她的怀疑的情况下搜集信息 We'll gather information without arousing suspicion.
好的 布里 看来你得心应手 Okay, Bree. Well, seems like you got a good handle on this.
当然 告诉我们进展就行 Definitely. Let us know how it goes.
是的 一旦危机来临 Yes, when it came to a crisis,
人人都愿意让布里做主 everyone was happy to have Bree in the driver's seat...
好吧 我去找苏珊谈 Fine. I'll talk to Susan.
即便布里自己 也想坐收其成 Even if Bree herself would have preferred to be a passenger.
身为五个儿女的母亲 As the mother of five,
勒奈特·斯加沃已经习惯被问到尴尬的问题 Lynette Scavo was used to uncomfortable questions.
你为什么吃圣诞老人的饼干 Why are you eating Santa's cookies?
我的金鱼哪儿去了 What happened to my goldfish?
你和老爸昨晚为什么总发出奇怪的声音 Why were you and daddy making funny noises last night?
没错 生了五个儿女后 Yes, after five children,
勒奈特以为已经无所不闻了 Lynette thought she'd heard it all,
直到遇上这个问题... until there was one question...
老爸和简是不是要结婚了 Are dad and Jane gonna get married?
让她始料未及 She never saw coming.
你为什么这么问 Why would you ask that?
不知道 I don't know.
他们成天在一起 而且... They're spending a lot of time together, and...
没事 你说吧 It's okay. You can say it.
他们看上去很开心 They seem really happy.
是你让她说出来的 You told her to say it.
宝贝 即使人们很开心 Honey, just because people are happy
并成天在一起 and spend time together,
也不代表他们会结婚 it doesn't mean they're gonna get married.
就好比蕾尼阿姨和我也成天在一起 I mean, your aunt Renee and I spend time together.
我们也没要结婚 And we're not getting married
除非你妈挣了大钱 till your mom makes a lot more money.
-我去开门 -好 - I'll get it. - Yeah.
准备好看"巫术"了吗 Hey, hey, hey, hey. You all ready to see "Wicked"?
-你好 勒奈特 -你好 - Hello, Lynette. - Hello.
天呐 看看你的头发 Oh, my god. Look at your hair.
我们成双胞胎了 We're twins.
还真是啊 Yes, you are.
佩妮 你从哪儿学来的 Penny, where did you learn to do that?
简教的 Jane taught me.
很简单 我也可以教你 Oh, it's easy. I could teach you, too.
我知道怎么编 Oh, I know how to do it.
好吧 我们该走了 Okay. Uh, we should go.
我们可能没法在11点前赶到家 We might not be home until 11:00.
-明天还得上学呢 -都怪我 - On a school night? - It's my fault.
我和那个邪恶女巫是高中同学 I went to high school with the wicked witch,
她邀请我们去后台看表演 可以吗 and she invited us backstage. Is that okay?
天呐 O-oh, my god.
可以吗 妈妈 Can I, mom?
我还能怎么说 What can I say?
既然你都当着佩妮的面问我了 Since you asked me in front of Penny.
-走吧 祖祖 -好 - Let's go, zuzu. - Yeah.
再见 Bye.
"祖祖" "Zuzu"?
对 她给佩妮取了个可爱的小名 Yeah. She's got a cute nickname for Penny.
我猜她也给你取了一个 "受气包" I bet she's got one for you, too--"Doormat."
什么 What?
她偷走你老公已经够糟了 It's bad enough she stole your husband,
你现在还让她抢走你女儿 and now you're letting her take your daughter, too?
我还能怎么办 What am I supposed to do?
我不能让佩妮夹在中间左右为难 I'm not gonna drag Penny into the middle of this.
看来简可没管这么多啊 Well, apparently, Jane doesn't play by the same rules.
我觉得是时候搞点小动作了 I think it's time to fight dirty.
这我可不会 I don't know how to do that.
那你走运了 Well, you're in luck.
她可能跟那个邪恶女巫一起上的学 She might have gone to school with the wicked witch,
但你以前的校友可是我 but you went to school with me.
现在来讲评一下大家的作品集 It's portfolio review time.
在这特殊的时刻 我要尽情地吐槽 That's the special moment where I tell you all
你们是多么烂泥扶不上墙 how you're letting me down.
话说作为一名曾经的老师 Okay, uh, speaking as a former teacher--
依然很爱抢话 Still pontificating.
现在也许有些人会说 Now some might say,
"他凭什么摆出一副高高在上的姿态" "he must think pretty highly of himself
"用刻薄的语言批评他人" to judge other people so harshly,"
对于这种想法 我想说 他就这样 to which I say, yeah, he does.
这家伙太过分了吧 Can you believe this guy?
我可以为他去死 I would die for him.
好吧 你这种态度很健康 Yeah. That's a healthy attitude.
当我打开你们的作品集 So while you're opening your portfolios
排列出来的时候 and arranging your works,
我最不想见到的东西就是 let me tell you what I do not wanna see.
一盆水果 Bowls of fruit.
孩童的画像 Portraits of children.
严寒的冬日风景 Frigid winter landscapes.
苍翠的夏日街景 Lush summer vistas.
但是 我还蛮喜欢其中一幅海景的 However, I do enjoy a nice ocean scene...
正是如此 它才没有 just so it's not ruined
因一艘画蛇添足的孤帆而被毁 by the addition of a sad, little sailboat.
你有好好看过我的作品吗 Did you look in my portfolio?
事实上 我仔细看了 As a matter of fact, I did.
我想磨练我的抗失望能力 I wanted to steel myself for disappointment.
好 重申一次 作为一名曾经的教师 Okay, again, as a former teacher,
你这样激励人的方式不对 that's not how you motivate people.
很显然不对 Apparently not.
因为你进这个班以来半点进步都没有 You haven't grown an inch since you started my class.
你的作品总是千篇一律 Your work's the same as it's always been--
绘画技巧很熟练但却毫无生气 technically proficient but totally boring.
你从来没给我惊喜 You never surprise me.
艾米就不同了 Amy, on the other hand,
毫无长处 但惊喜不断 is nothing but surprises.
谢谢您 Thank you.
别说话 亲爱的 Don't talk, dear.
她的绘画技巧烂透了 Her technique is atrocious.
猫爪子都画得比她好 Cats with crayons could draw more convincingly,
但她胜在真实 but what she does is real,
有血有肉 and it bleeds.
我爱这种感觉 And I love it.
跟着他下地狱我也愿意 I would follow him into hell.
我觉得已经置身其中了 I think we already have.
西利娅 还给我 赶紧给我 Celia, get back here! Give me that now!
吼够了没有 Hey, hey, hey, enough with the screaming!
过来 坐好 过来 Come on. Sit down. Come on.
这是什么玩意 肉沫意面吗 What are we having? Spaghetti and meat-shapes?
本来是肉球的 你指望我给你做什么 Well, they started off as balls. What do you want from me?
爸爸跟我们一起吃吗 Is daddy eating with us?
不了 亲爱的 他在睡觉呢 No, sweetie. He's taking a nap.
西利娅 别用娃娃 用叉子 Celia! Use a fork, not the doll.
妈妈 还记得那个湖畔小屋吗 Mom, remember that cabin on the lake?
咱们还能再租一次 Can we rent it again
去度春假吗 for spring vacation?
春天 现在连感恩节都没过呢 Spring? It isn't even Thanksgiving yet.
我知道 但我们一直都是秋天 I know, but we always plan
就计划度假了 our vacations in the fall.
谁知道那时候我们在做什么呢 Who knows what we'll be doing then?
我们等过一阵子再商量 好吗 Let's... just worry about that later, okay?
但我们明明都想去的 But we know we wanna go there.
为什么现在不能商量 Why can't we plan it now?
你能消停一会吗 Will you just stop?!
吃你的饭吧 Just eat your food.
我能跟她说什么 And what am I gonna tell her?
"对不起 宝贝 我们不能租那个小屋" "Sorry, sweetie. We can't rent that cabin
"因为到时候我跟爸爸可能会坐牢" 'cause daddy and I might be in jail by spring."
能别说了吗 我们不会坐牢的 Will you stop? We're not going to jail.
卡洛斯 这可说不准的 You can't promise that, Carlos.
都过去两个月了 It's been two months.
风平浪静 放心吧 Nothing's happened. Relax.
你为什么这么紧张兮兮的 Where's this coming from?
我是怕万一哪天警察找上门 I'm just saying, a cop could show up at the door any day
我们这个家就散了 and destroy our family.
而我们连把孩子托付给谁都不知道 And we don't even have someone to take care of the kids.
知道啊 我们做遗嘱的时候 Sure, we do. We named a guardian
指定了监护人 when we did our will.
是啊 苏珊 到时候她就是我狱友了 Yeah, Susan. She'll be my cellmate,
我们还会跟布里和勒奈特一起劳动改造 and we'll be making license plates with Bree and Lynette.
对啊 Ah, right.
那就再找其他人 Well, we'll just find someone else.
麦克卢斯基怎么样 How about McCluskey?
你在开玩笑吗 Are you kidding?
我冰箱里的肉 I've got meat in the freezer
在世时间都能比她久 that's gonna be around longer than she is.
我想到了 他们再合适不过了 Oh, I know. I know, and they're perfect.
鲍勃和李 Bob and Lee.
别这样 你好好想想 No. Think about it.
两个同性恋本可以天天在外面花天酒地 Two gay guys who could have been out dancing every night,
但他们却领养了一个孩子 adopted a child?
他们为什么选择这种生活 They chose this?
是啊 那能说明什么 他们不稳定啊 Yeah, what does that tell us? They're unstable.
我是认真的 他们真的是很出色的家长 No, I'm serious. They're great parents.
没错 确实 Yeah, they are.
好吧 就是鲍勃和李了 Okay. Bob and Lee.
问问他们 We'll ask 'em.
别担心 我们一定不会坐牢的 But don't worry. We're not going anywhere.
那可说不准 Can't promise that.
爸爸和简要来了 我去门廊等他们 Dad and Jane are coming. I'm gonna wait on the porch.
简要做饭 所以晚饭我就不回来吃了 Oh, and Jane's cooking, so I won't need dinner.
没事吧 Everything okay?
抱歉 我只是在看 I'm sorry. I was just looking
你婴儿书里的照片 at all these pictures in your baby book.
往日一幕幕涌上心头啊 I guess I was getting a little nostalgic.
妈妈 我的婴儿书里好像只有五张照片吧 Mom, my baby book has, like, five pictures in it.
但真的很美 想看吗 过来看 But they're really good. You wanna see? Look.
这是你一周岁生日时跟我和你爸爸照的 Here's you with me and your dad at your 1st birthday.
看看我们 Look at us.
那时真是相亲相爱的一家人 We were really a family then.
我们现在也是一家人啊 难道不是吗 We're a family now. Aren't we?
当然 当然了 只是 Of course. Oh, of course. It's just...
只是什么 Just what?
既然你问了 Well, since you asked,
因为你爸爸跟简好了 things are going to be different
一切都将变得不同了 since your dad brought Jane into the picture.
你是不是不喜欢她 You don't like her, do you?
我没那么说 她是个很聪明的女人 Oh, I didn't say that. She's a very smart lady,
很显然她很清楚怎么得到自己想要的 and she obviously knows how to get what she wants--
医学生涯 还有别人的丈夫 Medical career, other people's husbands.
但我不会说她坏话的 But I'm not gonna say anything bad.
我知道 你喜欢她 I know. You like her.
我是觉得她人挺好的 Well... I thought she was nice.
她对你 是很好 She is... to you.
也许那是因为她想把你也抢走 Maybe that's because she's trying to steal you, too.
但我说过 But like I said,
我不想说她坏话 I don't wanna say anything bad.
你该去门廊等他们了 You should go wait out on the porch.
不必坐在这里听我这个 You don't need to sit here listening to my...
原配的满腹牢骚 legitimate whining.
我不想去了 I don't wanna go over there.
我想留下来 陪你 I wanna stay here... with you.
如果你非常坚持留下的话 Well, if you feel strongly about it,
那我可以 and I can tell you do,
给你爸打电话借故推掉 I could call your dad and make an excuse.
行吗 Would you?
亲爱的 我愿为你赴汤蹈火再所不辞 Sweetie, I would do anything for you.
你可是我女儿 You are my daughter--
我的亲生女儿 My biological daughter.
谢谢 我爱你 妈妈 Thanks. I love you, mom.
我也爱你 波波 I love you, too, Bobo.
"波波" "Bobo"?
这名字我们再想想 We'll work on it.
我恨你 安德烈 Ugh! I hate you, Andre!
苏珊 Susan.
我按了两遍你家门铃 没什么事吧 I rang your doorbell twice. Is everything okay?
他的声音一直在我脑中萦绕 Oh, I can't get his voice out of my head.
声音 Voice?
是的 他不停地说我有多差劲 Yeah. He keeps telling me how bad I am.
真的吗 Oh, really?
这个声音还让你做什么吗 Uh, does this voice also tell you to do things?
抱歉 我知道我一定是疯了 Sorry. I know I must sound crazy.
只是 我盯着这块空白画布已经两天了 It's just, I've been staring at this blank canvas for two days.
我不眠不休 不吃不喝 I don't sleep. I don't eat.
那你挖出什么了吗 Do you dig things up?
-什么 -什么 - What? - What?
你刚问我是否把什么挖出来了吗 Did you just ask me if I dug something up?
我想是有人盯着空白画布的时间太长了 Oh! I think someone's been staring at a blank canvas too long.
布里 出什么事了 Bree, what's going on?
你来干什么 Why are you here?
好吧 那我就直接问你好了 Okay, I'm just gonna come right out and ask you.
-你... -嗨 - Did you... - Hey.
麦克 你怎么在家 Mike, what are you doing home?
我以为你去见本 商量工作的事 I-I thought you were meeting Ben about the job.
本来是这样 但他打过电话来说取消了 Yeah, I was, and then he called and said he had to cancel.
工地上出了问题 Something happened at the site,
整个工程都得停工了 and they had to shut down the whole project.
真奇怪 That's weird.
是的 他还说什么原因了吗 Y-yeah. Did he say what it was?
没有 No.
但他听起来很沮丧 But he sure didn't sound good.
我真得走了 Well, I really should be going.
等等 你说你要问我什么事 Wait. You said you were gonna ask me something.
没有的事 No, I didn't.
你真该远离这些画布了 You really need to get away from those paint fumes.
监护人 Guardians?
是的 Yeah!
以防我们有什么不测 You know, in case something happens to us,
你们会是抚养我家两个宝贝的绝佳人选 we think you guys would be terrific parents to our girls.
太荣幸了 What an honor.
我们很爱胡安妮塔 以及 Well, you know, we love Juanita and...
-另外那个 -西利娅 - the other one. - Celia.
名字就在嘴边 Tip of my tongue.
在这条街上你们有那么多亲密的朋友 But you have so many closer friends on the lane.
苏珊怎么样 What about Susan?
是啊 想都别想 Yeah, that'd never work.
为什么 Why not?
苏珊 Um, well, Susan...
是 is...
种族主义者 a racist.
什么 我都认识她那么多年了 What? I-I've known her for years.
从来没觉得她有种族歧视 I've never seen her be racist.
最近变了 是的 It's new. Yeah.
那布里呢 What about Bree?
是啊 一个房里间全是枪的酒鬼 才怪 Yeah! An alcoholic with a house full of guns? Genius.
勒奈特 麦克卢斯基 还有别人呢 Lynette? MmcCluskey? Anyone at all?
等等 Hang on.
你们俩是不是不太愿意 You guys have a problem with?
只是 我们还在学习如何照顾一个孩子 It's just, we're still learning how to take care of one kid.
你们有两个 而且她们都 You've got two, and they're both...
你懂的 You know.
怎么了 What?
都很捣蛋 Monsters.
我们都心知肚明 干嘛还兜圈子 You know it. We know it. Why are we dancing around it?
我会说她们是精力充沛 I was gonna say "Spirited."
不 不 不 不 No, no, no, no.
她们以前是这个样子 See, they used to be like that.
但现在已经变了 她们都长大了 They've changed. They're all grown up now.
我两个月以前还照看过她们 I babysat them two months ago.
胡安妮塔用拳头打了我的脖子 Juanita punched me in the neck,
另一个咬了我 and the other one bit me.
西利娅 她叫西利娅 Celia. Her name is celia.
说真的 朋友们 Okay, you know, seriously, guys,
她们现在已经改头换面了 They're like different people now.
规规矩矩 So well-behaved.
是的 你们亲眼见见就会相信了 Yeah. Y-you have to see it to believe it.
知道吗 这真是一个好主意 You know what? That's a great idea.
什么 什么 What? What is?
你们为何不请我们明天过来吃晚餐 Why don't you have us over for dinner tomorrow?
我们可以看看她们现在到底有多规矩 And we can see how well-behaved they truly are.
天哪 Oh, my god!
这真是一个好主意 That is a great idea.
但我不确定明天的时间 因为女孩们 But I don't know about tomorrow, because the girls...
正忙于她们的圣经盛会 are busy with their bible pageant,
以及她们大量的慈善工作 and their extensive charity work.
就明天 Tomorrow.
那好吧 Tomorrow.
再见 伙计们 明晚用餐时见 Bye, guys. See you at dinner.
-我们死定了 -没错 - We're dead. - Yeah.
鲍勃和李今晚过来用餐 Okay, Bob and Lee are coming over for dinner tonight.
现在我还有九个小时来教你们变得 That gives me nine hours to teach you
彬彬有礼 亲切可人 行为端庄 to be courteous, gracious, and well-mannered--
和你们平时的行为完全相反就对了 Exact opposite of what you usually are.
这就是你让我们逃学的原因 This is why you kept us home from school?
你们现在就在上学 马上开课 Oh, you're in school, and class is in session.
给我指出哪一个是沙拉叉 Okay, now which one is the salad fork?
什么沙拉 What's salad?
你最后一次梳头是什么时候 When is the last time you brushed your...
这是棒棒糖吗 Is this a lollipop?!
早就告诉过你这不是藏糖的好地方 Told you it wasn't a good hiding place.
快点 想一想 Come on. Think!
谁赢得了1995年托尼杯最佳音乐奖 Who won the Tony for best musical in 1995?
太难了 为什么同性恋不喜欢看卡通呢 This is too hard. Why can't gay people like cartoons?
你把它又从垃圾箱里捡出来了吗 Did you get that out of the garbage?
你没收到我的短信吗 Didn't you get my message?
佩妮不过来的信息吗 收到了 About Penny not being able to come over? Yeah.
最近这样的短信我收到太多了 Been getting a lot of those messages lately.
-佩妮 -那你为什么还来 - Penny?! - So why are you here?
来见我的女儿 To see my daughter.
我想知道这是怎么回事 I wanna find out what's going on.
嘿 Hey!
嘿 爸爸 Hey, dad.
我这周都没见到你 I haven't seen you this week.
一切还都顺利吗 Is everything okay?
是的 我最近有很多家庭作业之类的 Yeah. I've just had a lot of homework and stuff.
为什么不在我那边做 Why don't you do it at my place?
如果有关科学的话 You know, if it-- if it's science,
简就住在楼上 她可是高智商 Jane lives right upstairs, and she's a real brainiac.
不用了 谢谢 No, thanks.
我更愿意让妈妈来教我 I'd rather have mom help.
你是对简有意见吗 亲爱的 Do you have a problem with Jane, sweetie?
我明天还有很重要的考试呢 我得 I've got a really big test tomorrow, so I should--
等等 等等 Hang on. Hang on.
也许我和你需要一对一谈谈 May-maybe you and I need a little one-on-one time.
你记得我教你接球的公园吗 You--you remember that park where I taught you to play catch?
明天你放学后去那 只有我一个人 Well, I'm gonna be there tomorrow after school--just me.
我们可以一起玩玩 随你想做什么 We can hang out or-- or do whatever you want.
你觉得怎么样 What do you say?
好吧 Okay.
真奇怪 佩妮和简本来相处得很好 That's weird. Penny and Jane were getting along great,
突然间 and then, uh, all of a sudden--
突然间怎么了 All of a sudden what?
你是不是跟她说了简的坏话 Did you say anything to her about not liking Jane?
佩妮长大了 有自己的主见 Penny's a big girl. She has her own opinions.
好吧 Okay.
我只是想跟你确认一下 I just wanna make sure that we remember
这是咱俩之间的事 别把孩子牵扯进来 that this thing between us is between us, not the kids.
这不能怪我 Hey, don't blame me.
我又没有不考虑后果地 I'm not the one who jumped into a relationship
开始一段新的恋情 without thinking about the consequences.
你尽管去和新欢上床 [也有自作孽之意] You made your bed... with someone else.
我去给咱俩的孩子辅导功课 I'm gonna go help our daughter with her homework.
布里 Bree?
你好啊 Hello.
为了庆祝你第一天开工 I wanted to celebrate your first day of construction
我带了午餐来 with lunch.
我正吃着呢 I'm already eating.
工程上出了点问题 There was a little problem.
是吗 不介意我问问怎么了 Really? I hope you don't think me nosy if I ask--
我的人在树林里挖出一具尸体 My guys found a body buried in the woods.
天啊 报警了吗 Oh, my. Did you call the police?
还没 Not yet.
这具尸体 怎么发现的 So they found a body. How?
土壤样本检测时发现的 Uh, doing soil samples.
万圣节当晚就挖出来了 Um, they dug it up Halloween night,
一直放在一间库房里 put it in a storage shed.
都这么久了 怎么还不报警 And why have you waited so long to call the police?
我一直想找到一个解决之道 'cause I keep hoping I'll find a way out of this.
因为一旦报了警 'cause once I call,
施工地就成了罪案现场 my project becomes a crime scene.
警方会勒令停工 我就浪费了大把时间 They shut it down. I lose a lot of time,
和大笔金钱 and... a lot of money.
那真可惜 What a shame.
你肯定特别想 It must be so tempting to just...
让这具尸体就此消失 make the body disappear.
你肯定考虑过 把尸体埋在别处 I'm sure you've considered re-burying it
用酸把它溶解了 或者用铁链捆绑好 or dissolving it in acid or wrapping it in heavy chains
扔进湖里 and dropping it in a lake.
你肯定考虑过这些方法吧 I'm sure you've considered that.
对对 我当然考虑过 Y-yeah, yeah. Of course I have.
但是如果我擅自处理 之后一旦被查出 Uh... but if I hide this, and it comes out later,
那可是重罪 I'm committing a felony.
所以 And I...
我不能冒这个险 I can't take that risk.
我知道 但很多人会因此失业 I know, but think of all the people who'll lose their jobs,
还有 还有 And--and what about the--
那些挖出尸体的人该怎么办 the poor men who dug up the body?
他们 他们可能会被指控 They--they could face charges.
这我知道 布里 I know that, Bree.
抱歉 你说的恰好是 I'm sorry. You're just saying the same stuff
我一整天都在纠结的事 I've been thinking all day.
但这件事根本没有解决的办法 But there's no way out of this.
确实没有 不是么 There isn't, is there?
我还是报警 交给警察处理吧 I got to go call the cops, get this over with.
布里 Bree?
他是个很可怕的人 He was a horrible man.
什么 你认识埋在下面的人 Wh-what? You know who this was?
他伤害过一个孩子 He hurt a child...
一个我非常在乎的人 someone I care about very much,
他又准备再次伤害她 and he was gonna hurt her again.
布里 是你杀了他吗 Bree, did you kill him?
告诉我你没有动手 Well, tell me you didn't kill him.
报警之前 我要弄清这一点 I need to know before I go to the police.
我没有动手 I didn't kill him.
我朋友杀了他 我帮着把他埋在这里 My friend did, and I helped bury him here.
我的天啊 Oh, god.
你是想让我 销毁证据 And you want me to-- to make this go away.
我知道这要求太过分 I know it's a lot to ask.
但是没错 But yes.
我就是这么想的 That's what I want.
很抱歉 布里 Well, I'm sorry, Bree.
我做不到 I can't.
感谢万能的主赐予我们美味的食物 And thank you, lord, for this wonderful food.
愿主保佑我们的挚友鲍勃和李 And bless our good friends, Bob and Lee.
能与他们为邻 我们感激不尽 We are so grateful to have them as our neighbors.
愿主保佑他们外宿的女儿 And bless their daughter Jenny who is away at her sleepover.
我们对她甚是想念 We miss her so much.
愿主保佑全世界的孩子 And bless all the children of the world
不论他们是有爸爸和妈妈 whether they have a mommy and daddy,
还是两个妈妈 two mommies,
或两个爸爸 or two daddies.
-阿门 -阿门 - Amen. - Amen.
说得真好 That was really nice.
我们家吃饭前从来不做祷告 We never pray before meals at our house.
有些晚饭前 是需要向上帝祷告的 Well, some meals you just need to pray before.
你的裙子真漂亮 胡安妮塔 That's a beautiful dress, Juanita.
哪里哪里 I guess.
胡安妮塔 别谦虚了 Oh, Juanita. Don't be modest.
给我们讲讲这条裙子的故事吧 Isn't there a story behind that dress you'd like to tell?
其实 这条裙子 Well, actually,
和阿妮塔在《西城故事》穿的那条有点像 It's kind of like Anita's dress in "West side story,"
我一直喜欢那部音乐剧 my all-time favorite musical.
你喜欢音乐剧 You like musicals?
我喜欢音乐剧吗 Hmm. Do I like musicals?
当然喜欢 小傻瓜 你超爱的 Of course you do, silly. You love them!
从现在起 我先欠着 All right, I'm gonna have to owe you.
-我没零钱了 -5块的我能找开 - I'm out of singles. - I can break a $5.
真是个好孩子 Such a good girl.
确实是 She sure is.
-谁要加点盐 -不用了 - Anyone need salt? - No.
-我的天啊 -你毁了我 - Oh, god. - You broke me.
你竟然不请自入 And now you're inside.
我没法画画了 I can't paint.
每次盯着空白的画布 I just stare at the empty canvas
我就猜想你会多么讨厌我要画的内容 and wonder how much you're gonna hate what I do next.
这我倒是帮得上忙 Oh, I can help you with that.
是吗 You can?
对 我一定会厌恶至极 Yes. I'll hate it a lot.
这样行了吗 We good?
我怎么做才能让你认真对待 What do I have to do to get you to take me seriously?
你好 Hey.
当 当然了 O-of course.
这就合情合理了 It makes perfect...
这就是你在课堂上更喜欢艾米的原因吧 This is why you like Amy better in class.
错 我在课堂上更喜欢艾米 No, I like amy better in class
是因为她比你画得好 because she's a better artist.
现在这样是我在床上更喜欢她的原因 This is why I like her in bed.
回见 See ya.
你也看见了 苏珊 我还有事 So as you can see, Susan, I'm a little busy,
你要没什么事的话 So if we're done...
我还有事 We're not done.
我上课完全摸不到门路 I am totally adrift in that class.
这样的话 Okay.
我直接给你成绩好吗 Would it help if I told you what your grade is?
不是 我 我是说 我并不是想 No. I-I-I--I mean, that's not what I was--
-你的成绩是优 -真的吗 - You're getting an "A." - Really?
其实是优加 Well, actually, an "A"-plus.
等等 这对你而言还不够 Oh, wait. I'm sure that's not enough for you.
我可能还得告诉你 其他人都只是差 You probably also need to know everybody else will get a "D."
艾米 你的成绩是差 Amy, you're getting a "D."
随便你 Okay!
恭喜了 苏珊 Congratulations, Susan.
我不是让你给我一个虚假成绩 I do not want you to give me a fake grade.
你要是说谎 就没有任何意义 It doesn't mean anything if you're lying.
怎么没意义 Well, why not?
你也在说谎 You're lying.
我没有 No, I'm not.
每次你坐下来画画 Every time you sit down to paint
却从来不画你内心的恐惧与伤痛时 and don't paint the fear and pain that's in you,
你就在撒谎 you're lying.
每次你在乎 Every time you care
别人对你的作品的评价时 你都是在撒谎 what somebody else thinks about your art, you're lying.
我得走了 Uh, I have to go.
我曾经认为你是在压抑什么东西 I used to think you were holding something back,
而现在我在想 你内心根本一片空虚 and now I wonder if there just isn't anything there.
高高兴兴拿你的优加吧 So enjoy your "A"-plus,
可以后再也别来上我的课了 我们结束了 but don't come to my class anymore. We're done.
加布 今晚很开心 Gaby, it was a wonderful night.
你说的没错 And you were so right about the girls.
孩子们真惹人欢喜 They are an absolute delight.
她们唱《梦幻女孩》里插曲时 When they sang the "Dreamgirls" Number--
鸡皮疙瘩都起来了 真的 Goose bumps, seriously.
我很高兴你们能来 Aw, I'm just glad you could come.
你们俩对我们来说十分特别 You guys are so special to us.
加布 你没关车库门吗 Gaby, did you leave the garage door open?
你们就跟家人一样 Oh, I mean, you're practically family.
所以在我们考虑 That's why when we were thinking
谁能来做我们两个小天使的监护人时 who we'd want to be guardians of our precious angels,
只想到了你们俩 you two were the only ones we considered.
孩子们非常爱你们 而且... I mean, the girls absolutely adore you, and...
怎么 What?
同性恋都是蠢蛋
我的天 Oh, dearar.
除了这个 今晚还是很不错的 对吧 This aside, it was a pretty good evening, wasn't it?
我不明白 你到底在想什么 I don't get it. What were you thinking?
你爸和我可不是这么教你的 Your father and I did not raise you like this.
对不起 Sorry.
你能告诉我为什么吗 我想弄明白 Can you just tell me why? I want to understand.
我以为你喜欢鲍勃和李呢 I thought you liked Bob and Lee.
我是喜欢 他们人很好 I do. They're nice.
那我真糊涂了 你干嘛那样做 Then I'm confused. Why'd you do it?
行 睡觉去 Fine. Go to bed.
我们明天再来讨论怎么罚你 We'll talk about your punishment tomorrow
还有你怎么补偿人家 and how you're gonna make this up to them.
爸爸是不是快死了 Is daddy dying?
什么 What?
不是 你为什么这样说 No! Why would you even say that?
因为你们最近得表现有点不一样 Because you guys have been acting different,
爸爸也变得很贪睡 and daddy sleeps a lot,
还有 大家看起来都很伤心 and... everyone seems sad.
就连我们开心的时候 好像也... Even when we're happy, it's like...
我也不知道 就是很伤心 I don't know. Just sad.
爸爸好着呢 Daddy's fine,
妈妈也好着呢 and mommy's fine, too.
那你们为什么想要我们去跟鲍勃和李一块住 Then why do you want us to go live with Bob and Lee?
我听到你们在说这件事 对不起 I heard you guys talking about it. Sorry.
亲爱的 这叫做监护人 Honey, it's called being a guardian.
每个家庭都要有的 只是以防万一 Every family has that. It's just in case.
不过相信我 不会发生什么的 But trust me, nothing's gonna happen.
那 我们能租下那小屋来过春假吗 So... we can rent that cabin for spring vacation?
当然 Sure.
什么意外都不会发生对吧 And everything's going to be okay?
你保证 You promise?
划十字保证 Cross my heart.
上个礼拜是块磨牙饼干 Okay, last week it was a teething biscuit
硌了我的屁股 这次是这玩意 caked to my ass, and now this?
干嘛停车 你看什么呢 Why are we stopping? What are you looking at?
佩妮在这跟汤姆一对一单独见面 Penny's meeting Tom here for some one-on-one time,
我想确定 and I wanted to make sure
圣人简不会来搞三人行 Saint Jane didn't make it a threesome.
三人行 我看倒像是孤单一人行 Threesome? Looks more like a lonesome to me.
她没来 She didn't come.
可能她忙着呢 你说简是个医生对吧 Well, maybe she's busy. You said Jane's a doctor, right?
我是说佩妮 I was talking about Penny.
她竟然没来 She didn't come.
至少你不用担心简 Well... at least you don't have to worry about Jane
会搅乱你的家庭 busting up your family.
你说得对 You're right.
看来添乱的人是我 I seem to be doing that just fine on my own.
你好 布里 Hello, Bree.
查克 你来干吗 Chuck. What are you doing here?
放松 警察公务而已 Relax. Just police business.
追查一件失踪人口案 Following up on a missing person report.
你见过这男人吗 Have you seen this man?
两个月以前 Two months ago?
晚宴聚会的那晚 The night of that dinner party.
我们往你家走 路过他了 We were walking to your house, and we passed him.
就在这里 你记得吗 Right here. You remember?
我从没见过这个人 I've never seen that man before in my life.
你有没有听说过微表情 布里 Have you ever heard of microexpressions, Bree?
它在一个人的脸上一闪而过 They flash across a person's face
就几分之一秒的时间 for a fraction of a second,
揭示一个人真实的情绪 revealing their true emotion,
这是他们无法试图伪装的 instead of the one they're covering with.
警察就是这样知道人是否撒谎 It's how cops know when people lie.
这真是太有趣了 Well, that's all very fascinating,
可我没时间跟你聊这个 but I don't have time for this.
举例说明 For example, um,
当一个人紧张的时候 眉毛会扬起 When a person is distressed, their eyebrows go up,
额头上会出现皱纹 causing lines to appear across the forehead.
别碰我 Don't touch me.
你知不知道 有趣的是 Do you know, the funny thing is...
我都不需要微表情来告诉我你是不是在撒谎 I don't need a microexpression to tell me when you're lying.
仅凭我个人经验 就很熟悉这表情 'cause I know that look from personal experience.
每次我在你床上 I saw it every time I was in your bed
你说爱我的时候 都能看见 and you said you loved me.
既然现在我都知道你是在撒谎了 So since I know you're lying,
那你何不直接告诉我真相呢 why don't you start telling me the truth?
我可是警察 I'm a cop.
我知道 继续骚扰这女人的话 I know. Keep harassing this woman,
你这警察就要成为过去时了 and you're gonna wind up an ex-cop.
你最好别在这扮爷们儿 哥们 Um, you might want to watch it with the tough guy act, buddy.
我不像你 警官 这可不是在演戏 Oh, unlike you, officer, it's not an act.
我还会见你的 I'll be seeing you.
后果很严重 Big mistake.
他挺有趣啊 Well, he's a delight.
天啊 我在发抖 Oh, god. I'm shaking.
这事是不是跟那个 Does this have something to do with, uh...
我们在树林里说的事有点关系 what we talked about in the woods?
是 Yes.
那你没什么好担心的了 Then you've got nothing to be scared about.
没有尸体是很难立案的 Well, it's pretty hard to build a case without a body.
我的天 谢谢你 Oh, my. Thank you.
你为什么要这样帮我 Why would you do that for me?
很难说 说不定以后 Ah, you never know. Maybe someday...
我会需要你来帮我呢 I might need something from you.
我们这是... 怎么回事 What are we... what?
我以为我们是要去商场呢 I thought we were going to the mall.
-不 -亲爱的 听我说 - No. - Sweetie, listen--
我们能离开这儿吗 Can we get outta here?
拜托了 Please?
不 不能 No, we can't.
你得去跟你爸爸待一会儿 You need to spend some time with your dad.
我不想 I don't want to.
你没得选 你看看他 看看 I'm not giving you a choice. Look at him. Look.
你知道他为什么坐在那里吗 You know why he's sitting over there?
因为他非常想念你 Because he misses you so much.
那他就不该为了简 离开我们 Then he shouldn't have left us for Jane.
事情不是这样的 Well, that's not what happened.
他没有离开我们 他离开的是我 He didn't leave us. He left me.
他也不是为了简 他这么做是因为... And he didn't do it for jane. He did it because...
因为我们无法让彼此开心了 We just don't make each other happy,
后来他才遇见了简 我想她 and then he met Jane, and I guess she does...
可以让他开心 所以 make him happy, so...
就现在这样了 here we are.
可是你说简... But you said that Jane--
我知道 I-I know.
我说了很多不该说的话 I said a lot of things I shouldn't have.
对不起 I'm sorry.
他很爱你 佩妮 He loves you, Penny.
我们都爱你 We both do.
没有什么不怀好意的人 There's no bad guys here.
有的只是想要努力缓和关系的人 There's just people trying to figure things out,
那儿就有一个 and there's one of those people.
我知道他非常想跟自己的女儿传接球 And I know he would love to play catch with his daughter.
你比她美多了 You're way prettier than her.
你想喝点什么吗 You, uh, want something to drink?
不了 Uh, no.
我不是来做客的 我有事找你 This isn't a social visit. I need to ask you something,
又不能在电话里说 And I couldn't do it over the phone.
记得我说过 我可能... Remember when I said I might need you to, uh,
没准会用得上你 color outside the lines from time to time.
记得 Yeah.
我们在查曼树林发现了一具尸体 We found a body out in Chapman woods.
很可能只是无家可归的流浪汉 Now it's probably just some homeless guy.
可一旦我们报警... But if we report it--
这事交给我 I'll take care of it.
就这么简单 Just like that?
别的什么你也不想知道 There's nothing else you need to know?
我还是不问为好 It's better if I don't.
我欠你个人情 I owe you one.
嗨 本 Oh, hey, Ben.
嗨 苏珊 我正要走 Hey, Susan. Uh, I'm just leaving.
工地上见了 See you at work.
你得到那份工作了 太好了 So you got the job? That's great.
是啊 Yeah.
你先听听是什么工作吧 Just wait till you hear what the job is.
所以 本会去处理尸体 So... Ben will dispose of the body,
永除后患 他向我保证的 permanently, he assures me,
我们就可以脱身了 and we will be in the clear.
就这么轻易 Wow, just like that.
-布里 是我 -进来 - Bree? It's me! - Come in!
还有谁感觉这样... 好多了 Did anybody else think this would feel... better?
我感觉长舒了一口气 干得好 布里 I think it feels great. Well done, Bree.
我想我们彻底解脱了 Guess we got away with it.
感谢上帝你们都在 Oh, thank god you're here.
苏珊 怎么了 Susan, what's wrong?
你们知道本打算 Okay, uh... you know how Ben is
新建几幢公寓吧 putting up those new condoms?
他就选址在查曼树林 He's doing it in Chapman woods.
他手下的人发现了尸体 And some of his guys found the body.
他刚才让麦克把尸体处理掉 He just asked Mike to get rid of it.
-什么 -你开玩笑吧 - What? - You're kidding.
胡扯吧 Get out of town!
怎么回事 What's going on?
亲爱的 我们似乎已经知道了 Sweetie, we kind of already knew.
谁告诉你们的 Who told you?
没人 我们貌似去过那儿移尸 No one. We k-kinda went out there to move the body,
可尸体已经不见了 but it was gone.
后来我去找了本 尸体在他那儿 And--and then I went to Ben, and he had it,
他打算把它处理掉 and he was planning on getting rid of it.
等等 So, wait.
你们都知道这件事 Y-you knew all of this,
却从没想过要告诉我吗 and it never occurred to you to tell me?
是啊 Yeah.
但往好的方面想 我们现在都没事了 But bright side is we're all in the clear now.
对啊 霞多丽酒来点吗 Yeah. Chardonnay?
难以置信 你们先是把我拉下水 I don't believe it. You drag me into this thing.
罪恶感都快把我逼疯了 I am out of my mind with guilt,
然后现在遇到这可能危及 then there's this massive complication
我和我全家的重重险境 which could endanger me and my family,
你们甚至不告诉我 and you don't even tell me?
这就是我们不告诉她的原因 And here's why we didn't tell her.
这话到底是什么意思 What the hell does that mean?
面对事实吧 苏珊 你有点我行我素 Oh, let's face it, Susan. You're kind of a loose cannon.
是啊 我们达成协议要保守这个秘密 Yeah, I mean, 15 minutes after we made a pact
也就过了15分钟 to keep this secret,
你就求我们要告诉麦克 you were begging us to tell Mike.
是吗 可结果呢 我没告诉麦克 Oh, yeah? Well, guess what? I didn't tell Mike.
是卡洛斯说的 那现在是谁我行我素 Carlos did. So who's your loose cannon now?
什么 卡洛斯为何要这么做 What? Why would Carlos do that?
我不清楚 也是因为他不像你 Oh, I don't know. Maybe because unlike you,
他还有良知 he has a conscience.
可别逼我 苏珊 Oh, don't push it, Susan!
好了好了 放松点 Hey, hey, hey. Take it easy.
重要的是 尸体的事已经过去了 The important thing is the body is gone.
我们平安无事了 We're gonna be okay.
是啊 只要别再收到封信 Yeah, as long as we don't get another letter.
什么信 What letter?
是啊 什么信 Yeah, what letter?
加布 说好不告诉她们信的事 Gaby, we never told them about the letter.
糟糕 Crap.
苏珊 等等 Susan, wait.
不不 你收到了恐吓信 No, no, you get a blackmail letter--
与玛丽·艾莉丝那封 The same one
一模一样的恐吓信 而没有告诉我 Mary Alice got, and you don't tell me?
我们觉得你应付不来 We didn't think you could handle it.
这是你自己说过的 罪恶感快把你逼疯了 You said it yourself. You're out of your mind with guilt.
我们当初说好的是 永远保守这个秘密 Our pact was to keep this thing a secret,
而不是对彼此保密 not to keep secrets from each other.
我们完了 We're done.
你不觉得你反应有点过激了吗 Oh, don't you think you're overreacting a little?
我觉得她没有 I don't think she is.
你们不告诉我那封信的理由是什么 What's your excuse for not telling me about the letter?
宝贝 你正在跟汤姆处理分居的事 Well, honey, you were going through all that stuff with Tom.
是啊 我们是想保护你 Yeah, we were trying to protect you.
保护我 我是什么 孩子吗 Protect me? What am I, a child?
我们的事有人发现了 我有权知道 Someone knows what we did. I have a right to know that.
你当然有这权力 Of course you do.
你们知道我现在作何感受吗 You know what my life feels like right now?
我以为我了解的一切 Everything I thought I knew,
我可指望的一切 都不复存在了 everything I could count on is going away.
这不是真的 你指望得上我们 That's not true. You can count on us.
不 我显然不能 No! Apparently I can't!
是的 我们都在寻求各自生活的主宰权 Yes, we're all seeking control over something in our lives.
我们或许会去 We may want to
掩盖棘手隐情的残骸 cover up the remains of a troubling secret...
或是舒缓放手时的疼痛 or ease the pain of letting go...
或是抹去孩子犯下的过错 or erase the mistakes of our children.
但有时 真正能让我们的生活 But sometimes the only way we can
焕然一新的方法... truly change our lives...
你终于做到了 Finally.
就是无论代价如何 ...is by letting go completely...
都彻底放下 no matter what the cost.